Walking Contradiction

I think I suffer from delayed reaction syndrome. I've realized that corresponding through email, though it may backfire, sometimes may be the best course of action. The reason being because in person I never know how the person is going to react, so I'm often thrown offguard. And when I'm thrown offguard, I have issues with responded eloquently/in a witty, smart, or just understandable way. So many times I don't. I respond with silence. And then, five minutes later, when I've thought of what to say, the moment has passed. The times I do respond "in the moment" my comments usually don't make sense. For example (I think I really like examples) in high school, during an awkward crush moment, I said something like, "this is just like when..." and then I forgot what I was saying in the middle of the sentence. I blanked. I think I was thinking of some made-for-tv-movie or something. Probably wouldn't have made sense if I had remembered. God was probably trying to save me from more embarassment by just cutting me off. The person obviously was weirded out, as was I. So you see, sometimes it's better not to say anything in the moment, if you haven't thought it through.
If I do choose to respond, after thinking it through, the person is usually like, "are you really still on that?" It's makes for a very awkward situation. So, I'm rethinking my previous post (I do that a lot). I think that is probably why I'm so indecisive, because I have issue with committing to an opinion or anything for that matter. Probably why i'm gulible. If presented with enough facts or arguments, I often choose to rethink my stand on issues. Or I'm a middle of the road kind of person--never really extremly for or against anything. I think that annoys people...no, I know it does. Once, in college, a friend came into my room as an MTV music video was playing. She was extremely offended by the message. I could care less. She said I was apathetic. But really, I think that I just had a delayed reaction. I don't get boiling mad about issues (or passionate about issues) until I'm thoroughly versed on them or at least thought them through. And there really aren't many that I am or have. So, maybe that makes me apathetic. Maybe that makes me self centered. Who knows.
So after this thorough analysis (we're back to cyberspace vs. in person. keep up), I now think awkward cyberspace is better than awkward in-person conversations. At least in cyberspace you can just delete the message and pertend like the person doesn't exist. You know, 'cause that's the adult, mature thing to do. Cyberspace makes it much easier to ignore the situation at hand, which is always, always a plus.